Positive Thinking

A few recent events have happened in my life which have led to me wanting to change the way I think. At work on Friday I had an incident and a member of staff was drilling into me that I was such a "negative person" and I had a "negative way of thinking". Of course I was quick to deny it but then I sat and thought. "Am I really a negative person?". This thought was going round and around my head for the rest of my shift, and I came to the conclusion I need to change my way of thinking.

I consider myself around 95% completely recovered from my Anorexia. Obviously I have bad days etc., but for the best part I no longer think about food in the "negative way". I feel as though in order to fully recover I need to do two things.

1. Get my weight even higher (I'm currently only just in the "healthy range")
2. Change my way of thinking.

I am a negative thinker. Whenever I wake up my usual thought is "oh great work/school". Before I leave the house I think "I really don't want to go to work". When really; I don't mind work/school. So why am I thinking these thoughts? I don't know this answer but I hope to change my negative thinking. 

In order to let go of my Anorexia, I need to be thinking positive. I feel as though I am also negative about myself which is stopping me from fully recovering. For example, the usual "I'm so ugly" thoughts in the morning or "my thighs look huge today" aren't helping my recovery. I need to turn these negatives into positives. For example;

"My thighs look huge today" - Translates to - My thighs can't physically look huge, I'm on the low end of a healthy weight they can't. And anyway; what's wrong with big thighs? Nothing. 

I feel as though I have a negative look on other people. I'm not even going to deny it. When I see people I'm quick to judge and assume (which is wrong and horrible, I know) but again this is something which I want to work on changing as I don't agree with this. What are my negative thoughts and perceptions about other people going to do? What am I gaining from thinking bad about someone else? Nothing. 

A few steps which I am wanting to change in order to become a more positive person are;

• Avoiding self negative talk - For example, not thinking that I'm ugly or I look fat today. Embrace it and give myself positive thoughts.
• Avoid talking bad about work/school - Be thankful I have a job. The current UK unemployment rate is 5.6% (source) and I have a job. Be thankful I can earn my own money and have my own independence. Also be thankful I have an education, think of all of the other children around the world unable to access education.
• Take responsibility - Don't blame others for things which may go wrong/happen. For example, don't blame customers at work for putting me in a bad mood. I am my own person therefore I am the one that has to change my way of thinking. 

• Find the silver lining - For everything which happens. Learn to look for the good in the bad. For example, being told I'm working a 9 hour shift on a Saturday may seem bad - but then think of the money I'll earn from it.
• Associate myself with positive people - I feel as though when I leave school I will become more positive. It's the time of year when we're about to leave and obviously tensions are running high, once all the weight has being lifted I'm sure it'll get easier. Also when I leave school some people will instantly leave my life - Hopefully the negative ones.

^^^ These are two of my favourite quotes and I'll be trying my hardest to stick to them! ^^^

Well this has been a super long ramble post about all the thoughts flying around my mind...I hope someone gains something from this as well as me! :) 

Further reading;

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/tips-help-you-think-more-positively.html
http://psychology.about.com/od/PositivePsychology/a/think-positive.htm

Izzy